What If...?

I heard a saying the other day; can't remember where now, but it said :

"What if you woke up tomorrow with only the things you thanked God for tonight?"

Whoa, right?! Needless to say my prayer was quite a bit longer than normal tonight. I thought of every little thing I use on a daily basis all the little treasures I take for granted and of course the big important things I have been blessed with, like my amazing children and wonderful family. And on, and on.... and on! :)

When you stop to think about everything you have, all God has given us... it's truly amazing. My brother Jake, who is on a mission in Brazil, told us to pay attention to our blessings and not to let any go unnoticed or unappreciated.

It's important to be thankful for what we have, because if we are not grateful there is a chance that we might lose it.

What will you be thankful for tonight?

Protesting Fiesta Foods!

I noticed that there were some really great deals going on at Fiesta Foods this week, especially on meat and produce so I planned to do a little shopping there before we headed out to get the rest of our list from Wal-Mart. I had my two littles with me (which naturally ups the stress level regardless of how well behaved they are), my coupon binder, and a detailed shopping list of what I was going to get.

  

We get there and park all the way to the far back side of the parking lot. Extra walking is a bonus and I drive a huge Suburban (with little power steering fluid in it at the moment) so I need lots of room to maneuver. As we walk in it's raining and all the carts are outside, soaking wet, without any paper towels in sight. That's ok, it's not their fault it’s raining sideways and gets under their overhang covering all the carts, but still annoying. We try to get into the store and there is a family just inside blocking the entrance and discussing whatever little ghetto jewelry they wanted to buy located at some weird little kiosk inside the front door. I politely say excuse me, (maybe they didn't hear me, or speak English) but they didn't move. So we patiently waited, I said excuse me again... still nothing. They didn't move until someone behind us said something in Spanish they then moved so we could pass through into the store.

Once inside, I notice it's packed. Really, really busy. I found it quite difficult to maneuver in the store because the aisles were so narrow; I couldn't fit my cart down if anyone else was in the same aisle. It was impossible to shop side by side with other people. Once Quinn got knocked into the Top Ramen by someone trying to get past us and no one apologized. Not entirely their fault but a little acknowledgement would have been polite. Also, their store doesn't follow the typical grocery store set up (in my opinion) so it took longer to get what I needed quickly.

Finally, we were done and we headed to the checkout lane. They had three cashiers, and about 3-4 people waiting at each lane. It was so bad that the people were waiting in the already too packed and too narrow grocery aisles, super. I stand at the closest lane (there was no way to get to the other lanes without going around the back part of the store. When it's our turn the lady starts ringing out our groceries and I set my coupons and wallet on the little checkout stand there next to her. I finally get all the stuff up on the conveyer belt and notice it's one of those stores that makes you bag your own groceries. Ok no big deal. I head down there and start bagging them. I had a lot of stuff so my items went on both sides of the bagging lanes. I was hurrying as fast as I could while keeping tabs on my antsy kids. Then the cashier announces she is done. I tell her that I have a few coupons to use also; she told me it's too late. I started to protest and then realized it wasn't going to make her take them so I just paid for it all. (Major bummer). At this point I hate this store and promise never to return unless they have a killer deal and I am only coming for a few things. After I pay I go back to bagging my groceries. She asks me to please hurry as she cannot check out the next person until I collect my things (just for the record I was not dilly dallying) I explain to her that I am going as fast as I can and will soon be done. She mutters something in Spanish and turns toward me to put her hand on her hip, then turns to the next cashier to say something. Meanwhile this little cart pusher old man starts helping me finish bagging. So sweet. But he happened to put my watermelon on top of my chips, which it rolled off of and landed nicely on my bread. But at this point I just want out of the store so I just ignored it.

We were finally on our way out of the store, we make it out the doors and I am stopped by some Hispanic lady in a red hoodie, she informs me she works for the store and flashes me some dollar store looking badge. She asked for my receipt and told me I didn't pay for a toy Quinn was holding (I let him get it to keep him entertained while we were in line. I remembered handing it to him while I was bagging groceries. I paid for it.) She had my receipt and said she didn't see it on there and told me I needed to come back into the store with her. I stopped protesting and followed her into the store. She went right to a cash register, rang up the toy and returned informing me that shop lifting is a serious offense and she caught 3 different people yesterday and they all had to pay a $250 fine, and that the toy I stole was not worth it. She said she was going to give me a second chance and I only owed her $3.57 today and that she hoped I would learn a lesson from this.

She handed me my original receipt back, I politely informed her that I did in fact pay for the toy but rather than bagging it I handed it to him. I pointed out where on my receipt it rang up "Candy/Toy Gun". She looked at it, and said oh, it rang up under candy, that's why I didn't see it. She then handed Quinn his gun back. She then asked me about the top ramen on the top of my purse, I told her that my daughter opened it but that I had the cashier ring it up and showed her the outer packaging with the bar code on it that was in one of my bags, and then pointed out where on my receipt it showed up. She said oh ok, I just have to follow up on these things. I get it, theft is huge, and rather than pay for security cameras they hire people to pretend they are regular people grocery shopping and follow you around. Note to shoplifters: watch out for a middle aged Hispanic lady in a red hoodie and way too much make-up. (*Huge sigh of relief that I did pay for that toy*, my kids have done that before, but luckily I got to stand in line for 20 minutes so I was fully aware of the toy.) I did learn my lesson though. Do not shop at Fiesta Foods. (Yes I realize I could probably file a complaint, but she was just doing her job, and apparenlty from the 3 previous shoppers a necessary one.Iif it wasn't for all the crap leading up to that point it totally wouldn't have even felt like a big deal. Heck, it's already funny to me!!)

But the fun does not end there...

We finally get back into the parking lot and unload our groceries; I return the cart, buckle the kids into the car and then realize that the jeep parked next to me has crossed over the standard yellow parking line. And it's going to make it very difficult for me to back out. I try to back out, it's a no-go. I was offically stuck,( well... unless I wanted to inflict some serious damage on a little white camry. It's not like they have security cameras, lol). The parking lot is too narrow as well. Most places are, which is why I park iin the back... by no one else. Ugh. I could't back out without turning my steering wheel a direction it won't go while moving slowly. I pulled back in and thankfully the owner of the jeep showed up a few moments into my inner tantrum. I only had to wait for them to load up their car and pull out before I had enough room to back out and leave my own little hell on earth.

I will NEVER, not EVER!! Step foot into Fiesta Foods again. NEVER, not even if they have a great sale (they can be price matched at Yokes anyway!!) But even if they were giving out free groceries to everyone named Sarah I would not go. :)

*Please note this are my own personal feelings about the store, you are welcome to have your own. However, if they are of a positive nature I will delete them to uphold the integrity of my whinny post! :) lol.

Grocery Shopping

Why is going grocery shopping so difficult? Why is it when we are out of food no one hesitates to complain to me, but when I offer to go I can't find a babysitter anywhere?! Yes, I can take my littles shopping with me... I have done it a hundred times before, but why do it when I don't have to? It's an added hour (at least) not to mention the stress of keeping them safe and near me at all times (I can't fit inside the clothing racks like I used to.)

Because I know that no one wants to babysit for me when I do go I rush. I run around, quickly grabbing the essentials I will need until Shellie can watch my kids...again. Tonight, the last night to use my doublers I wanted to go. I told my husband I wanted to go, that I needed to go. I have been creating make shift (but delicious, (: of course) meals for 2 days now. I have officially run out of ideas. He told me he needed to study for an exam and write a paper for school tomorrow. Ok fine. Jesse had football. Brad was going to work out. Shellie was in Othello. Then... after dinner, my husband started playing a video game with his kids. Great! Spending time with them is just great. So I left. Didn't say good bye. I was going to be so quick he wouldn't notice. I went to Walmart. Literally ran through the store grabbing my essential breakfast/lunch/dinner necessities. Total time collecting my items: 13 minutes. I went to check out. Every line was packed. I picked one line. Stood there for 10 minutes, realized it was the wrong lane to be in. So I moved down two. Of course the line I left picked up speed. (Isn't it always that way?!haha) Right then I committed to my new lane. Well, the man in front of me had problems with his card. He swiped it, didn't work, he tried again. Then his wife tried. Then the cashier tried; first on his side, then on her side, then on his side one more time. The he tried it again... then the cashier tried typing in the numbers. Nothing worked. His wife pointed out the ATM so I waited as he walked to the ATM and it didn't work. Then his wife tried it. Then he came back and decided to go to their bank and come back later so she delayed the transaction, which took a manager approval. I felt bad for the guy, really I did. That is my ALL TIME worst fear. How awful. It almost happened to me once, but that's another post all together. (thank heavens for xanax) Anywho 45 minutes later the cashier began scanning my items. One of my coupons didn't scan she said she was going to call over a manager (the same manager that took 10 minutes to get there last time.) Uh. No thank you. I just took my coupon back and said "Don't worry about it". It took me an hour and a half to grab 10 things at Walmart, I skipped Alberstons all together. Not enough time. Well, I left one bag behind... the giant package of steak. The only thing Brad can eat. *sigh* And I was in such a hurry that I didn't even grab the receipt out of the cart when I was getting into the car, so I can't go back in and prove I paid for it. Bummer.

It's sad that I have to fight for the "privilege" to go out and buy everyone food to eat.

Recipes: White Popcorn

Just so I never lose this recipe again!

*White Popcorn

1 lb butter
2 3/4 cup sugar
1 cup corn syrup
2 tsp vanilla or almond extract (whichever you prefer!)

Place ingredients in a saucepan. Melt on med-high temperature. Stirring constantly. Bring to a boil and boil for 30 seconds. Pour over popcorn and stir to coat.

*Doesn't have to be white, a few drops of food coloring and you can have any color/theme you want! Think:  Orange - Halloween, Green - Christmas, Red - Valentine's Day, Pastels - Easter/Spring, Blue - July 4th ... pretty much anytime!! haha.
Soooo good, not so good for you! lol.

Anxiety

I have been dealing with some serious anxiety in my life lately. My current 'right-this-second' anxiety? I am running out of my "happy pills". I don't have a prescription for them (yet) and I can't afford to buy any more. I keep counting how many pills I have left and calculating the days til my demise. I almost want to take them all now so I don't stress about it anymore.

Therapy?

So I am seeing a mental health counselor. Well... meeting with her and signing paperwork so that in 6 weeks we can maybe start to discuss my issues. Annoying. Three weeks ago I had my intake appointment. Today I had my first appointment where we discussed disclosure details and legal stuff. In 3 more weeks we will go over my treatment plan, and emergency plan... and maybe, just maybe if we get all the paperwork done we will discuss my issues and set up a psych evaluation at the following appointment.

Wow.

That's a lot of waiting. What if I was in serious trouble? What if I came looking for help as a last ditch effort before killing myself? Pretty sure I wouldn't sit around in my misery for 9 weeks waiting for someone to hopefully start to help me. I know there are emergency channels for things like that, but it wouldn't surprise me if they had hoops of their own.

so freaking MUCH!!

I love my kids. Ah, they are amazing. They do and say the cutest things. They are so polite and fun. They are both very sensitive and know when someone needs an "i lub you" or a sweet hug. I am so happy they are mine and I don't want them to grow up and change... eventually they will not be so willing to hug me, and one day they will tell me the hate me, not love me. So I do my best to take lots of pictures, write down tons of stories, and soak up the cuddles and loves I can. I love, love, love 'em!!! :)