Forgive and Forget

Everyone at some point or another has had mean things said about them. It's true. Whether it was said to your face or behind your back it has happened. Most likely more than once. So, it really is no big deal, right? I mean, it happens to everyone so why the hoopla? Why not let it go... forgive and forget. Move on.

Forgive and forget. Wouldn't that be a blessing? ... and a curse? Just think about it, if you forgot what you learned from every painful expierence you've ever had you'd be doomed to repeat the same situations over and over.

Don't misunderstand me, I have totally forgiven and forgetten, completely. I remember being sad or mad, but can't for the life of me remember why. Silly things happen, between cousins that will always be sisters, sisters who will always be best friends, sometimes even  friends you've just met. Countless dumb things for dumb reasons. Can't really remember ...  because I forgot!! lol.

Sometimes I won't let myself forget. I will forgive but to forget is to make myself too vulnerable. Like an old once upon a time, amazingly awesome, two peas in a pod, kind of "friend", who in one of my darkest moments posted something negative about me as a comment on facebook... another "friend" sent me a link to the comment showing her face next to the comment she swore up and down she didn't make when confronted about it. I didn't bother to prove it to her. She denied it. That showed me who she really is, any further discussion wouldn't make a difference. But what followed the simple mean remark was a horror film of backstabbing reality I can't forget. Do I still talk to her? Yes. Are we friends? No. But I still love her and pray for her continued happiness in life. I forgave her, but I can not... no, will not forget.

Other situations, well ... they need outside intervention. One time, one guy. I haven't forgiven. The pain, embarrassment, betrayal too deep... too real. I have forgiven as much as I can... and, I know I need to be better at it, he even asked for forgiveness, not directly to me. Years later he ran into my sister. He had changed his life around, and appeared to be genuinely sorry for what happened and told her to pass along his deep regrets for what happened so long ago. I don't talk about, I try not to remember it. And quite franky, I am just glad it wasn't me he ran into. I will forgive him, I'm sure I will eventually, but quite frankly that one's gonna involve therapy and Jesus. :)

Life is full of hard lessons, but life is good. Focus on the positive, and do your best to learn from your mistakes and whatever trials that come your way.  Plus... too much worry, stress and negativity give you the kind of wrinkles that no cream can smooth out. :)